I heard this song on the radio the other day and thought about Regina. It's hard to be sad knowing how, I would love for all believers to be home for Christmas. Another song comes to mind sung by Mercy Me written by Bart Marshall Millard, I give both credit b/c I am going to quote some of the lyrics.
I can only imagine what it will be like when I walk by Your side
I can only imagine what my eyes will see when Your face is before me
Surrounded by Your glory what will my heart feel? Will I dance for You Jesus? Or in awe of You be still? Will I stand in Your presence or to my knees will I fall? Will I sing, Hallelujah? Will I be able to speak at all? I can only imagine when that day comes and I find myself standing in the sun I can only imagine when all I will do is forever, forever worship You.
I believe Regina will be in awe and as I stated from a conversation before this song was written that she wants to just sit at the feet of Jesus for the first thousand years. I am also sure she will sing Hallelujah because she loves to sing and forever worship Jesus. Man what a day that will be for her. Not too long ago before Regina was not communicating she wrote on her board to me, "I am ready to go home. To my new home where cancer doesn't exist, no pain, no sorrow, no tears." I kept talking to her and I reminded her this is not our home, yes Jesus went and has prepared a new home and that where I am you may be also. Regina will be face to face on that day she is finally called. Regina is strong but her body is week. She is comfortable and unless God's mighty hand touches her soon He will be bringing her home within a few days. So, yes she will BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS.
Oh how I love her and am missing her already. This is by far the hardest thing I have ever gone through. I want every person she has ever known to be able to say "see ya later" on that day. So, if you are still trying to decide what you are going to do about this "Jesus" you have heard about. Ask me how to have that relationship it's not too late for you until you breath that last breath. When will that be, and are you sure you have that long???
On a personal note as things go I am having a medical procedure done today at 3:00pm, they are going to remove more tissue from a mole that was on my face, for as long as I can remember, removed it on the 18th and came back positive as Melanoma. Only in our current situation am I be the least bit concerned. So pray they get it all and there is no need to do anything else.
Thank you and may God Bless you all.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Thanksgiving
Never take for granted what you have, it could all be gone someday. Life has but one promise and that is an END. This is not the end of your soul it is however, the end of your time here on earth. It is also not a sad thing it is a very natural thing, not a fun thing but a natural event. We don't know when it will happen we just know that someday it will. Big question the is where oh where has my soul gone??? You can have assurance that you can spend eternity in Heaven and you don't have to do anything for it. In fact I don't care how much you try you can't: buy it, earn it or even deserve it. You do have to BELIEVE something though. You must believe that God sent His Son to live here on earth: live a perfect life, be tempted the same way you are and to pay the price for sin. His name was Jesus and He came to do for us, and do what we can not do for ourselves... We are brought into relationship with a God that allows no sin because Jesus' blood on the cross paid the price as a perfect sacrifice. So, if you beleive in your heart and confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord you spend eternity with Him. Because He said, "I go to prepare a place for you, I will come back again abd receive you unto myself, so that where I am you my be also." (John 14:3) Don't take anything for granted be (THANKFUL AND GIVING) for life her and here after.
Well, we have seen more days than any nurse at Hospice thought we would and we are Thankful. I am Thankful for...
1. A God who knit me in the womb. making me what I am today.
2. His saving grace that is sufficient everyday as I rely on it.
3. Showing Himself to me that I can know Him personally.
4. protecting my wife, Regina until He prepared our meeting.
5. God giving me the one person that fills every void I have 23-years, 5-months, 1-day ago and counting.
6. four incredible blessings we call; Katie, Madison, Hannah and Harrison
7. the fact that each one has responded and call Jesus--Lord.
8. a free country founded upon Christian principles.
9. men and women who protect those freedoms.
10. a home to live in.
11. a church home that loves serving God.
12. a Pastor that even teaches on the hard issues of the Bible and unashammed.
13. the living and breathing Bible he preaches from, "God's Word" to us.
14. the many people who have loved on, prayed for and cryed with us.
15. a spouse that shows me how to persevere.
16. affliction for without it I could not see my blessing.
17. peace that passes all understanding.
18. "Hope", the hope that assures me, I will one day see loved ones again.
19. God's provision, yes a place to come and work hard and see my wears.
20. extended family that stand firm with us.
21. the many nurses that care for Regina everyday.
22. the many people that have sat with her, provided a meal or even a HUG.
23. The ability to write this down so I don't keep it in.
24. and following each and every breath that remains in Regina's body.
I have truly been blessed and I knoww you are too. Many don't know it, because they forget to give. Give themselves so we can see our problems are small, when we focus on others. I end with this; as Regina lives out the last few days of her life be thankful and give of yourself.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING and God Bless each of you.
Well, we have seen more days than any nurse at Hospice thought we would and we are Thankful. I am Thankful for...
1. A God who knit me in the womb. making me what I am today.
2. His saving grace that is sufficient everyday as I rely on it.
3. Showing Himself to me that I can know Him personally.
4. protecting my wife, Regina until He prepared our meeting.
5. God giving me the one person that fills every void I have 23-years, 5-months, 1-day ago and counting.
6. four incredible blessings we call; Katie, Madison, Hannah and Harrison
7. the fact that each one has responded and call Jesus--Lord.
8. a free country founded upon Christian principles.
9. men and women who protect those freedoms.
10. a home to live in.
11. a church home that loves serving God.
12. a Pastor that even teaches on the hard issues of the Bible and unashammed.
13. the living and breathing Bible he preaches from, "God's Word" to us.
14. the many people who have loved on, prayed for and cryed with us.
15. a spouse that shows me how to persevere.
16. affliction for without it I could not see my blessing.
17. peace that passes all understanding.
18. "Hope", the hope that assures me, I will one day see loved ones again.
19. God's provision, yes a place to come and work hard and see my wears.
20. extended family that stand firm with us.
21. the many nurses that care for Regina everyday.
22. the many people that have sat with her, provided a meal or even a HUG.
23. The ability to write this down so I don't keep it in.
24. and following each and every breath that remains in Regina's body.
I have truly been blessed and I knoww you are too. Many don't know it, because they forget to give. Give themselves so we can see our problems are small, when we focus on others. I end with this; as Regina lives out the last few days of her life be thankful and give of yourself.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING and God Bless each of you.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Lesson's Learned
First and foremost I'd like to thank all of you for your thoughtful posted comments they are timely and well received. I also want publicly apologize to a reply to a comment that was made as well. You see I didn't agree with the position taken and instead of receiving with the love that it was intended, I took it as on opportunity to "enlighten for fellow Christian" and that was the wrong thing to do. You see God has a way of dealing with us, as we need to be reminded of our own fallible tendencies. None of us is so smart that we are right about everything, don't get me wrong it is absolutly necessary to correct the essentials of Christianity but we should never divide over the nonessentials. Some topics require both sides to keep level heads and keep emotion far removed only dealing in facts. With all this said I do believe Romans 14 to be true.
Updates on Regina are that: she is comfortable, she is now in a hospital type bed in our room, she has lost most of her fine motor skills(so is unable to right). Now don't think this means she can't communicate her face and eyes speak volumes. Here face said it all as the NEHBC praise team come to the house and sang praise and worship songs, we prayed and just had church right there in our bed room. It is something to have a keyboard, two guitars and two extra vocalists in the room all at the same time singing praises to the Lord, with some old hymns and some even more contemporary stuff. We had a blast something the attending nurse will not soon forget. I her Rose, on the phone calling all of her friends telling them how she got to work and come to church and never left the same building. She went on and on about how special Regina must be to all the people that know her, she said, "I'll just have to wait 'til the other side of life to get to know her like these folks know her now..What a Blessing, What a Blessing." Rose now understands why so many come by to see Regina; she touched many lives it's because she reflects Jesus. She put on Christ's love because she too knew that she could offend people some times while in the flesh. It is so wonderful to be a part of a Community that accepts us right where we are and ministers to both saved and the lost.
The other thing that happened this weekend is that our two oldest Katie and Madison went down to te 5th Ward and advertised for the Crisis Pregnancy Center that is housed within the Farrington Mission that God has blessed NEHBC with. Katie has stated that God's calling was brought to her front and center. Her life will forever be changed as she takes this next step in her walk as a Christian. Madison has not said much yet, but it normally takes longer to resinate and then you can start to see changes being made. All of this to say that our children are growing up to know what is means to be mission minded and part of a community of believers.
This is all for know check back soon.
God Bless
Updates on Regina are that: she is comfortable, she is now in a hospital type bed in our room, she has lost most of her fine motor skills(so is unable to right). Now don't think this means she can't communicate her face and eyes speak volumes. Here face said it all as the NEHBC praise team come to the house and sang praise and worship songs, we prayed and just had church right there in our bed room. It is something to have a keyboard, two guitars and two extra vocalists in the room all at the same time singing praises to the Lord, with some old hymns and some even more contemporary stuff. We had a blast something the attending nurse will not soon forget. I her Rose, on the phone calling all of her friends telling them how she got to work and come to church and never left the same building. She went on and on about how special Regina must be to all the people that know her, she said, "I'll just have to wait 'til the other side of life to get to know her like these folks know her now..What a Blessing, What a Blessing." Rose now understands why so many come by to see Regina; she touched many lives it's because she reflects Jesus. She put on Christ's love because she too knew that she could offend people some times while in the flesh. It is so wonderful to be a part of a Community that accepts us right where we are and ministers to both saved and the lost.
The other thing that happened this weekend is that our two oldest Katie and Madison went down to te 5th Ward and advertised for the Crisis Pregnancy Center that is housed within the Farrington Mission that God has blessed NEHBC with. Katie has stated that God's calling was brought to her front and center. Her life will forever be changed as she takes this next step in her walk as a Christian. Madison has not said much yet, but it normally takes longer to resinate and then you can start to see changes being made. All of this to say that our children are growing up to know what is means to be mission minded and part of a community of believers.
This is all for know check back soon.
God Bless
Thursday, November 10, 2011
"WEAK" Five
Today my heart is heavy as I try to work and fight back emotions. Last night I came home from work with a surprise that I thought Regina would enjoy. The problem is, when I walk in the door Katie informs me that Mom has not eaten today and won't let them feed her because she says,"I have already eaten." So, I go into the room to talk to her: ask her about her day, bring in a guest to see her and tell her about the surprise. Her eyes were happy and she seemed in good spirits so I asked why she hadn't eaten yet? She begins to mouth that she has, and I persist that she hasn't. At this point I see the look of confusion on her face, knowing I wouldn't lie to her, and she begins to sob. My consoling calms her and makes me realize that the wife I know and love is starting slip away little by little. Her frail body is starting to give up its fight, as she realizes this is not her home. Yes, we are sad as a family that we will one day, maybe soon, loose Regina on earth. But our hope is in the fact that one day we will be reunited in heaven rejoicing together, at God's awesome plan.
I now recall a time when we were talking about what we would do or ask Christ when we get to heaven. I thought the first thing she would want was to have a conversation with Eve and give her a peice of her mind. Or that she would want to speak to her Nana, her Maternal Grandmother a person to whom she was very much fond of and, if the truth be told, was very much alike. Or, that she would maybe want to talk with another one of her heroes of the Bible, but no not Regina. Her answer gave me perspectve of who she was and were her trust was placed. She said, "For the first thousand years I just want to sit at Jesus' feet and do nothing except thank Him for the nail scars on them." I don't even remember what I said because from that moment those words changed the way I live on this earth. Realizing that one day I will be in heaven and I too want to have the privelige of sitting at Jesus' feet thanking Him for paying the price for my sin.
I love my wife. And I love you, but I don't love you as much as God loves you. You see He sent Jesus to take upon the sins of the world. Yours and mine, that we too could be in heaven with Him someday. He loves you enough to provide the way. You however; must accept His gift by confessing with your mouth and believing in your heart, that Christ was crucified for sin, died for it and was raised from the dead so that he could provide righteousness to you.
Even though Regina's body is weak her faith is stong. She is still "Praying to Live but Prepared to Die" We pray just as Jesus did "for the cup to be taken away, But not our will His will" to be done.
God Bless
Kevin
I now recall a time when we were talking about what we would do or ask Christ when we get to heaven. I thought the first thing she would want was to have a conversation with Eve and give her a peice of her mind. Or that she would want to speak to her Nana, her Maternal Grandmother a person to whom she was very much fond of and, if the truth be told, was very much alike. Or, that she would maybe want to talk with another one of her heroes of the Bible, but no not Regina. Her answer gave me perspectve of who she was and were her trust was placed. She said, "For the first thousand years I just want to sit at Jesus' feet and do nothing except thank Him for the nail scars on them." I don't even remember what I said because from that moment those words changed the way I live on this earth. Realizing that one day I will be in heaven and I too want to have the privelige of sitting at Jesus' feet thanking Him for paying the price for my sin.
I love my wife. And I love you, but I don't love you as much as God loves you. You see He sent Jesus to take upon the sins of the world. Yours and mine, that we too could be in heaven with Him someday. He loves you enough to provide the way. You however; must accept His gift by confessing with your mouth and believing in your heart, that Christ was crucified for sin, died for it and was raised from the dead so that he could provide righteousness to you.
Even though Regina's body is weak her faith is stong. She is still "Praying to Live but Prepared to Die" We pray just as Jesus did "for the cup to be taken away, But not our will His will" to be done.
God Bless
Kevin
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
24 hour nursing care
Wednesday evening about to leave work and go to mid-week worship. I truly enjoy spending time with these people. I have laughed, cryed, prayed, witness, worshipped and learned how to be a true servant of God with these folks. Many of you are commenting on the blog and that is great. Some of you may not be able to come and wish her a happy "Graduation" and I understand, but I promise I will read these comments to here. Regina
is now on 24 hour nursing care to administer medication and allow us to be a family. No it doesn't make things easier, just adds a new challenge. Have you ever tried to sleep in your bed and someone you just met is sitting across the room watching. "I don't sleep very well!" to say the least. What does all this mean people are asking? The fact is Regina's body is indeed declining. She will be with us as long as God allows and not a minute longer. You see we are not giving up on the fact that God may still heal her we believe that HE can. But, just as Jesus did in the garden, "Not my will but your will" You see I want what is the BEST for Regina and so does God. So my prayers have changed a little; now I pray for comfort, peace, contintment and most of all for rest.
AS FAR AS Harrison: he is fine, went back to school today and I am sure he's tired. I am sure he is tired of telling the story of how it happened. Enjoy the pictures. Before surgery and After with pins in place.
is now on 24 hour nursing care to administer medication and allow us to be a family. No it doesn't make things easier, just adds a new challenge. Have you ever tried to sleep in your bed and someone you just met is sitting across the room watching. "I don't sleep very well!" to say the least. What does all this mean people are asking? The fact is Regina's body is indeed declining. She will be with us as long as God allows and not a minute longer. You see we are not giving up on the fact that God may still heal her we believe that HE can. But, just as Jesus did in the garden, "Not my will but your will" You see I want what is the BEST for Regina and so does God. So my prayers have changed a little; now I pray for comfort, peace, contintment and most of all for rest.
AS FAR AS Harrison: he is fine, went back to school today and I am sure he's tired. I am sure he is tired of telling the story of how it happened. Enjoy the pictures. Before surgery and After with pins in place.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Get behind thee
9:00 on a Saturday night sitting in the ER at Texas Childrens Hospital waiting to have surgery for Harrison. It seems as though he fell while trying to hop the fence and instead of doing a face plant he put out historic wrist to break the fall and his head actually hit his forearm and broke it. Compound fracture with bone exit, splint and wrap and ran to the emergency room and then transferred via ambulance to TCH. Katie wants to know when we are going to catch a break and I have to remind her the we are all in a broken world and things happen to us all. We are in our temporary home waiting for or call home. Satan can mess with us but he can never have us and it's play to remind him of his dome. Harrison will be fine, we pray for quick healing without infection and full us of his arm. We do pray that that is God's will.
Regina is doing okay, very weak and in a great deal of pain. Her anxiety is high and the nurses are doing what they can to keep her comfortable.
I'm glad I slept late today I am going to need it.
So I say it get behind thee Satan you have no authority here.
Regina is doing okay, very weak and in a great deal of pain. Her anxiety is high and the nurses are doing what they can to keep her comfortable.
I'm glad I slept late today I am going to need it.
So I say it get behind thee Satan you have no authority here.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
October 26, 2011
Thank you for all of your responses, they help me remember all of the great times and fond memories that I am starting to share with Regina. Keep them coming as you recall them, it truly touches me to see how many lives my wife has touched.
I remember one time sitting out in front of or driving the parking lot of a store that Regina was going to run in and get one quick thing. An hour later I walk in to give her "A piece of my mind" and see her hugging a little old man in his 80's. I asked her, " What was taking so long and who was that?" She started to cry, telling me she was going to report that rude cashier. "What?", I said. Regina then begins to tell me the story, with every sorted detail play-by-play, I'll give the Readers Digest version. The man was purchasing something and the cashier mumbled a price to the man, who either didn't understand him or hear the cashier. To which the cashier said the amount again. Then to put Regina over the top the young man, not schooled in respect, Says L-O-U-D-L-Y and S-L-O-W-L-Y the amount for a third time. Regina said the man just looked at the money in his hand and looked very puzzled at the cashier and the register. Regina had had enough, she informed the young cashier of his rudeness and lack of respect and helped the man count out the amount needed to pay his bill. To make matters worse he didn't have enough, so Regina informed the cashier she would pay the difference. She paid for hers and the rest of his, ran to catch up to the man and asked him if he was alright or needed any help. The man with a tear in his eye said, "Thank you, I don't know why I got so confused, my wife and I would always come here and now that she's gone I have to shop by myself." "I don't like to but I needed to." Regina has a soft spot for the "Seasoned Citizens" she always has. Regina knew every detail of that mans life. She has always been able to make you feel comfortable and safe to share anything. Love that girl. Okay I can't see the screen to type anymore so I'm ending it for know.
God Bless and Love you all!
I remember one time sitting out in front of or driving the parking lot of a store that Regina was going to run in and get one quick thing. An hour later I walk in to give her "A piece of my mind" and see her hugging a little old man in his 80's. I asked her, " What was taking so long and who was that?" She started to cry, telling me she was going to report that rude cashier. "What?", I said. Regina then begins to tell me the story, with every sorted detail play-by-play, I'll give the Readers Digest version. The man was purchasing something and the cashier mumbled a price to the man, who either didn't understand him or hear the cashier. To which the cashier said the amount again. Then to put Regina over the top the young man, not schooled in respect, Says L-O-U-D-L-Y and S-L-O-W-L-Y the amount for a third time. Regina said the man just looked at the money in his hand and looked very puzzled at the cashier and the register. Regina had had enough, she informed the young cashier of his rudeness and lack of respect and helped the man count out the amount needed to pay his bill. To make matters worse he didn't have enough, so Regina informed the cashier she would pay the difference. She paid for hers and the rest of his, ran to catch up to the man and asked him if he was alright or needed any help. The man with a tear in his eye said, "Thank you, I don't know why I got so confused, my wife and I would always come here and now that she's gone I have to shop by myself." "I don't like to but I needed to." Regina has a soft spot for the "Seasoned Citizens" she always has. Regina knew every detail of that mans life. She has always been able to make you feel comfortable and safe to share anything. Love that girl. Okay I can't see the screen to type anymore so I'm ending it for know.
God Bless and Love you all!
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